From Small Red Chambers Unbeknownst To Many..

It took me quite a while to realize exactly what it was that I REALLY wanted to do with my life.. And when I ended up gaining about 22 pounds after realizing that what I wanted to do was eat fast food and drink Pepsi all day, while watching Matlock (I wasn't working).. I figured that maybe I should try something else.. I still eat fast food and drink Pepsi all day, but now I think "skinny".. And I'm not gaining any weight (and the 22-odd pounds are gone).. but I'm not gonna ask questions.. The universe seems to be working in my favor.. Fine.. But don't you ever feel like the whole world is against you?.. I still can't get over those cold chicken nuggets that I had last night.. I didn't have the BEST day, and in that case my "meal" can be something of a meditative cleansing.. Anyone that REALLY knows me knows this; and even though everything that I both know, and believe in, tells me that it's not only inappropriate, but unhealthy as well.... it happens to be number 43 of my 217 "thorns in the flesh".. You only have so much flesh to work with in the first place, so understand that I don't always feel as though I'm running with both legs.. But I knew I'd find solace in the nuggets... The nuggets.. Those warm, precious nuggets in all their glory; with their crispy outside, and tender, juicy inside.. Not without the hot mustard (of course).. This, has many a time pulled me from the lurch.. Well.. This was not to be the case last night.. I felt like a wounded child going to bed without having had supper.. Trivial?.. Petty?.. Who's to say?.. I'm a "victim of my surroundings" yes, but who isn't?.. Everyone is.. Whether or not you "succumb" to it doesn't change anything.. But I happen to be a victim of my generation as well.. I constantly feel the need to apologize for my idiot generation.. but to who?.. None are perfect, after all.. You've got your lazy generations.. your self-righteous generations.. your rebellious generations.. your "intellectual" generations.. and so on.. Even the nicest house has an unpleasant smell coming from the toilet.... I guess the trick is to do your best to keep it there.. I think I've just grown a tad bitter of my own because of course it's much more personal.. I've never been able to "identify" with them, but believe me.. I'm glad.. It's actually quite a task to even look at someone's personal profile anymore without seeing a few oh-so-hip photos of them holding their plastic party-cups.. "Look at me, I drink!" It's like posing for a picture while you're reading the newspaper, to show everyone just how complex you are.. You hear that everyone has their own assigned guardian angel walking around with them all of the time.. I think that everyone should have a PR person as well.. You really CAN'T tell a book by it's cover.. But I think you can really find out.. almost pretty much everything you need to know about a person.. by glancing at their personal profile.. And you know what I've learned?.. I'm surrounded by a bunch of indulgent, meandering morons.. With alcohol and the weekend gatherings of immorality at it's best, serving as their constant muse.. Even still.. I know that there ARE lots of "good" people out there.. I wish I could say that I was one of them..